Wednesday 5 October 2011

4th of October

It is 4th of October again, another rainy day, but in Edinburgh this year. Today matches a year since the first time I’ve seen her. I remember the sweet feeling when I decided I WILL TALK TO HER.

A year full of events, changes, sickness, revolutions, new friends, lost friends, and finally a career change. I have taken too many life changing decisions this year, even though I don’t feel something had actually affected me, as if I’m living in a glass shell.

It is 4th of October again, I asked “is this place is taken?” as I’ve seen her talking to another guy before entering the building, she responded with her sweet accent “No, it is free”

I’m still trying to explore myself; I thought when I move out of my country, my whole life will be more precise, and even more directed. I was wrong. My course of life is changing every day, I’ve never thought in my wildest dreams, that I will be a Technology Strategist at that age, I’m not sure till now am I capable of doing that or not.

It is 4th of October again, I said “Sorry, if I’m interrupting you too much”, and she said “No, No, I’m just writing about what I’ve been through today” and then she closed her notebook looking at me with a smile on her face.

"What is happening to my eye sight" I had this words my head while I was walking to the gym, and suddenly a black spot came up in the middle of my eye sight. I took the incident lightly even after I knew it was a stroke that hit a branch artery in my eye. My friends were wondering where am I getting this confident, and how am I so calm with a confident attitude (sometimes to a reckless extent even). I was sure this is something good, I didn't know how, and I didn't why, I just knew this is for my best. May be it was a divine trust, I just felt so

It is no longer 4th of October, it is someday in May after my birthday and before 20th, she said "................. so I decided not to talk to you again".

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